Timeshare: an intro to the cold line…

BOSS: Morning everyone.

ALL: Morning.

BOSS: Firstly, I want to welcome Fiona to the wonderful world of cold line. Just make a friend, darling, make a friend… that’s all we’re asking you to do.

PAUSE.       

Right. It’s the time of the year. We know shit’s coming through the door. You had a pile of shit. So did you. You had a pile of shit. We’re getting these piles of shit, shit you want to wipe off your shoe. The pieces of dog shit sitting here at Sunset Beach Club, they buy. It’s your job to turn these pieces of shit into buyers. And they do. Yours did, didn’t they? Good job, mate.

BOSS HANDS OUT SPIFF SHEET. 

ROUND OF APPLAUSE. 

And you too. Well done. You’re back on form. Keep it up.

BOSS HANDS OUT SPIFF SHEET TO A SECOND SALESPERSON.

ROUND OF APPLAUSE.

You see you can get results if you don’t prejudge. I also want to apologise on behalf of Gary. To all the reps who didn’t get out yesterday. To you Debbie. To you Mark. To you motor-mouth. Who else didn’t get out? Of course, and to you Gillian. Because of Gary none of you got out. Because Gary took it upon himself to spin his UP you all lost your chance to make money. This woman’s got a mortgage to pay. He’s got kids. She’s got to pay the rent. And he’s… well…

SALESMAN: I’m saving for a penis extension.

BOSS: So I’ve heard. So on behalf of Gary’s complete disregard for his team, I do apologise. Anyway, let’s get out there and make some money!

ROUND OF APPLAUSE

BOSS: And Fiona, welcome to the topsy turvy world of timeshare.

 

*** “Spiff”: Slang term for the sum paid by an organisation to a salesperson to motivate him or her to push the product. No sale, no money. ***

*** “UP”: Unit Prospect ***

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