Railay, Thailand (Jamrock)

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We had breakfast at the resort. Best yet. Aside from the Metropolitan in Bangkok of course. Then we burnt to a crisp by the infinity pool, had lunch at the pool bar (because we couldn’t be arsed to move) – onl180 baht for Pad Thai – and burnt some more.

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Then at around 4pm, the heavens opened. And it began to storm. It’s 5.15pm now and it’s still chucking it down. Victor’s having a nap. And I’m writing this whilst simultaneously trying to kill a mosquito.

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As creatures of habit, we headed in the same direction for dinner as last night. We didn’t explore the beach to the right of our hotel. More fool us. For some reason, we were blinkered and thought we were limited to the tacky shacks at the front (where the boat from Phi Phi dropped us off). In this patch of Boreville, there was a Thai guy with a guitar and some sickening just-married dinner booths dotted around the beach. Disgustingly cringeworthy. Not at all romantic. Not in my book anyway. Then again, I’m not really the marrying kind and romance-overload sends the wrong sort of shivers down my spine. Anyway, we found a place that didn’t evoke a gag reflex and we both ordered Thai green curry. Except that when it arrived, there was no curry. So we did a runner.

At a loss, we ate at our hotel. They pretended they did green and red curry – but we both got green. It was pretty good though and my bowl came with a lot more chillies. We also tried a crab combo dish with avocado. And they let us drink a bottle of wine we had bought for ourselves in sheer desperation earlier.

A gay couple, whom we briefly met when we arrived at reception, walked by and I asked them if they’d found any cool bars. Turned out they had so we followed their footsteps and ended up in Jamrock. “I get high” was playing on a loop as stoned barmen played the bongos (badly). If you fancy a joint, they’re 200 baht – and, by the looks of some of the faces floating around, they’re pretty damn strong. I always thought tourists would avoid anything that could lead to a Bridget Jones moment… apparently not.

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